Well, I’m sure the morning news from Washington (the one out here) will show
it differently, but I have some results from the Govererns debate for you
here. Why the hell are you watching that crap you may ask? Well, the answer
probably won’t surprise you.
I’m a cynic.
The only reason I’m watching a debate between two people that will have
approximatly 0% affect on me is the same reason I watch political ads. I
think all polititians are crooks, liers and backstabbers, and the ads that
they put on TV show me I’m right 🙂
The contestants (cause you know that that is what they really are): Gov. Locke
and Gov. Carlson.
The results:
Amount of the two minutes of opening statements spent slamming their opponent: | 50% |
Amount of time responding to the actual question asked during the question period: | 20% |
Approximate amount of time spent looking at the person to whom you are responding: | 10s |
% of relevance in answer to question: | .3% |
Amount of time the responses sounded scripted and human. | 5% |
Number of times the phrase “We are number one in going from welfare to work” was sputtered out by Locke. | 15 in the first half hour |
Amount of the 30s rebuttle time spent slamming their opponent. | 29.942s |
Amount of moving blame to previous governments, Washington (the other one, where things actually matter), or other factors. | Any time something bad or insufficient about them is pointed out. |
“The issue is very complex.” | Hurl |
References to “Initiatives” or “Plans”. | Far too many. |
% Bullshit in answers | 99.9999999999999999999999999999% |
Amount of time spent refering to their opponent in the 3rd person (“What Mr. Locke thinks…” “It appears that Mr. Carlson believes…”): | 100% |
Time spent not looking like they have a pole stuck up their ass while the camera is not directly on them. | Nope. |
“Coincidental” and “relevant, really it is” stories reminding everyone he’s a pastor and is a good God-Fearing Man. | 1 by Mr. Carlson. (I’m guessing that this means he stepped in a church once) |
Smarmy remarks to their opponent (“Wow Mr. Locke, you’re supporting recommendations and they haven’t even come out”). | Lots |
Reminding the public that if the vote the other one they’ll wait another 4 years to see any action. | 48 |
Displays of lack of knowledge of BC geography. | 3 |
Corrections of “mis-statements, which I don’t believe were unintentional” (“that mean man lied about me daddy!”) | 12 |
Amount of backtracking as to what they are supporting versus what they are saying (or at least according to their opponent) | 87% |
References to an “esctatic press release” (WTF???) | 1 |
Amount of 2m time spent slamming their opponent in their closing statements: | 1:55 |
See what I mean? Hell, even I can do that!