Guess what. UPS, my favorite courier company
screwed up yet again. Huge surprise there. Just like my
huge surprise when I called to find the status of my package and discovered
that the unit number of my office (which I had given them TWICE) had gone
missing, and that the driver had left a ‘need unit #’ note.

So I called, bitched to Mandy, then talked to a manager (Peter,
1-800-PICK-UPS extension 2341) and explained again, and of course he couldn’t
give me any explanation as to why it should take 5-10 phone calls and 5 or
whatever delivery attempts and 2 [deleted] weeks to get a package from burnaby
to me.

Lets just say that if it’s not here at the office tomorrow (as I have both
Peter’s and Mandy’s personal (whee) assurance it will be) Peter will
be hand delivering it to me, and then will be cleaning my car tires with his
tounge if I deem he should. Simply un-acceptable. And UPS will be
hearing about this in the most strongly worded language that I can muster.

To my buddy whom I was out till midnight with talking about love, the
internet, and women in general, good luck dude. I was actually going to write
an essay on love and romance over the internet, and how it happens and if it
works or not. Just a matter of time. Good luck. (of course, who needs luck
when you can send a poem like this to the lady
on the recieving end of your affections <g>).